Mid-summer nesting

Sorry I haven't updated in a while.  Everything is still going well.  I've been keeping busy with cleaning and organizing and generally doing stuff that I won't be able to do for at least a year after this kid is born.

I actually even switched out my maternity clothes with my regular clothes in my closet.  That was a big step for me, and I have to tell you that pretty much the whole time I was doing it, I had a looming sense of dread, and the feeling that I was taking a big risk by committing to a positive outcome. 

Any time I talk about how I've kept some baby girl clothes "just in case," T tends to give me the look or say something about "why I can't just be optimistic."   We had one such conversation the other night before watching Secret Millionaire (which I totally love, in case you care.)  In the conversation, I reminded him that our odds aren't that great - two live babies to three dead ones.  At the beginning of the show, the millionaire revealed that he had lost his third child to a still birth at a late gestation.  T said, "I get it," (in a kind, not sarcastic or annoyed way) knowing that I was about to give him the "I told you so" look. 

On the symptom front, I have cankles.  I mean, they're not as bad as some pregnant women (who I really feel bad for by the way) but for me, they're pretty bad.  I hope to God they're just from eating too much sodium and from the ridiculously hot humid weather the past few weeks.  It could also be from all the standing while I clean and while I was getting ready for the kids' birthday party which was last weekend.

They're 5 and 2 now.  E's birthday was yesterday, and D's birthday was on Wednesday.   I can hardly believe that they're that old already.  D starts KINDERGARTEN in September.  I have a kindergartener.  Holy crap.  Along those lines, I figured out the other day that I graduated from High School 17 years ago.  When I say "I'm 35" I don't feel as old as when I say, "I graduated from High School 17 years ago."