Thursday, June 21, 2012

Two reveals and final results

I told one friend this weekend and it was awesome.  She was so excited for us, and in spite of her own previous issues, she seems to have moved past her emotional pain and is able to be truly happy.

Second reveal was the one I was more worried about.  She has been doing fertility treatments for about 8 months unsuccessfully.  As I expected, there were tears, and I felt awful.  I kept telling her that I was so sorry for having to tell her now but I didn't want to see her at some point and be really showing and have her ask me.  I told her I knew it wasn't going to be all happy for her, and she reassured me that it should be a happy thing.  I don't think she's angry - just sad for herself.  It makes me so very sad to have to cause someone that kind of pain.  We really didn't have a chance to finish the conversation because there were other people around, and I haven't heard from her since the weekend.  Now I'm not sure if I should reach out to her via e-mail or just let her process.  I'm thinking process for now. 

There's another person I'm worried about telling because she has been trying to get pregnant since before Christmas.  We're going to her house for a party next weekend, and I'm not sure if I should tell her before or if I should wait until after.  I guess I should feel lucky that I'm not showing enough yet that I'm forced to be out.  Should I take the gamble that she won't figure it out during the party?   That would be even worse... 

We told D (and E, who has no idea what's going on) over the weekend too.  He sounded excited, and has asked a handful of questions, but I think it's still a very abstract concept until he starts to see my belly growing.

Quick update on how gumdrop is doing.  The final amnio results are back and everything is normal.  My placenta is anterior and has pulled up away from the cervix, so things are looking good.  At this week's appointment to check fluid post-amnio, baby's heart rate was 148, and my BP was 110/70.  I've felt movement here and there over the past few weeks, but I felt my first real kicks that made me smile at the wall yesterday. 

Thursday, June 14, 2012

Results are in

Preliminary amnio results are in (meaning the most common issues) and everything looks good so far.  We'll find out the final results in about 10 days. 

Relief.  Sweet relief. 

The anatomy that they could see on the level 2 u/s also looks normal but we have to go back in 3 weeks because it's not developed enough yet to get the full picture.

I don't think I really talked about the actual amnio the last time I had one with E, but it was horrible.  Truly horrible.  (That's probably why I didn't talk about it.)  I remember the doctor said something like, "you may feel a little cramping."  A little?  It felt like what I would imagine being punched in the gut feels like.  The needle hit my uterus and my uterus immediately clenched up like a fist.  NO FUN. I was so shocked that I gasped/grunted, loudly.  (I have a pretty high pain tolerance, so that was kind of unusual for me.)

That being said, I was dreading this one.  I was worried it would be the same feeling, and I figured that at least I knew what to expect this time, but I still wasn't excited about it.  Happy to report that this time, it felt NOTHING like the last time.  There was a pinch, and a little tug as my uterus responded, and then a crampy feeling each time the doctor extracted fluid (3 vials) but it was SO much better than the last time, thank god. 

Heart rate was 143, and it was wiggling around like crazy.  Good times.

17 Weeks on Saturday.  Getting ready to tell some people.  Wish me luck...