Wednesday, July 1, 2009

Bad news

Well, I had my ultrasound today and it would appear that I can now call myself a "Real" infertile. Yes, that's right. My body has successfully killed off its third child in one year.

I had some cramping feelings over the weekend last weekend. I was pretty freaked out, but I was also feeling gassy and bloated, ended up having some gastro-intestinal issues (yes, you know what I mean) and was hoping it was just first trimester bloat.

The ultrasound today showed that the baby had died at 8 weeks (so, over the weekend). Guess the major stomach upset all makes sense now.

The good news is that my insurance will cover chromosomal testing this time because it's a third miscarriage. The bad news is that I'm having cramps right now and I'm so afraid that I'm going to miscarry naturally before tomorrow's D&E. If I do miscarry naturally, no chromosomal testing.

We did learn something new and interesting today. The doctor thinks that they WILL find something through the chromosomal testing. The baby was measuring 8 weeks, but the gestational sac was only measuring something like 6 weeks 4 days. I asked him about the last miscarriage, and he said it was the opposite story. Baby was smaller than the gestational sac. Ideally (in a healthy pregnancy) the sac and the baby should measure the same. That could mean that we have chromosomal issues to deal with which is much scarier than low Progesterone.

Maybe little D is our one miracle baby and he's all there is for us...

22 comments:

Stacie said...

I am so sorry this has happened again. This is just awful and unfair.

I hope that you're able to have the D&E so that you can get the chromosomal testing done. You need answers.

((((HUGS)))) to you and your husband.

Yaya said...

I'm so so sorry. :(
I started crying the second I started reading your post. This is not fair. It freaking sucks. Why does this happen? I just wanna scream for you or punch a wall, or do something. It's not fair.

If you do m/c at home you can 'collect' the baby and put it in a tupperware to bring in for chromosomal testing. (put tupperware in fridge). I know that sounds so so wrong and gross and everything, but it's true. If you have more questions please email me.

I'm so sorry and I'm sending you some big (((Hugs))) right now.

Alicia
www.yayastuff.blogspot.com

Jeanne said...

She,

I am so sorry for your loss. I just read your sad news. My thoughts are with you and your family at this difficult time.

Jeanne

Dawn said...

I know there are no words that can make this any easier, but please know you and your husband are in my prayers. I am so very sorry that you have to go through this again.

Cara said...

My heart goes out to you as you do this again and I pray that you get some answers...

just me, dawn said...

I am so sorry that you are experiencing this again! ((hugs))

wifey said...

I am so so sorry. It sucks, and it just isn't fair. I hope you can get some answers through the chromosonal testing.

You're in my thoughts.

Endobaby said...

I am so so sorry. You don't deserve this hon.

I hope that nothing happens till your D&C and you finally find out whats going on.

Hugs...

Christa said...

Oh my gosh, I am so sorry you're going through this again. My heart just aches for you. I can only imagine how shocked and upset you were during your ultrasound. Please don't beat yourself up because there's no way you could have known this was happening. I know you did your very best during this pregnancy, I wish life wasn't so unfair. You certainly didn't deserve this, no one does. I'm praying you make it to your D&E. Please keep in touch, I know how hard these next few days, weeks & months will be for you. We are all here to help.

((BIG HUG))

Christa.

Ibis said...

I'm so sorry to hear this. My thoughts are with you.

Karen said...

I am so, so sorry. I'm out of town and just now reading this and I wish there was something I could do for you. I know you loved this baby and were so scared of this happening. It's unfair and cruel and miserable and should never happen to any family. I hope you get some answers and can find a way for your family to be complete. (((hugs)))

Anonymous said...

I am so so sorry for your loss. I just started catching up on blogs today and I saw your post and immediately my heart dropped and I started crying....

You did your absolute best to nuture this baby and pregnancy and this is so so damn unfair.

I am saying an extra prayer for you.

((HUGS))

Wifezzilla said...

I am so sorry. SO sorry. please let me know if you want my email addressif you'd like to talk or anything. this is not the news i wanted to hear, but i am sure oyu know that.

my heart is broken for you.

Shelli said...

I'm very sorry for your loss. I've been there too (still, actually). I had my son, and then 5 miscarriages in a row. I can feel your pain, and hope that you can find some answers.

Michele said...

I'm so very sorry. This just breaks my heart. Sending hugs...

Sue said...

I'm here from LFCA. I just wanted to say I'm so sorry for what you're going through.

You are in my thoughts.

JuliaS said...

Here from LFCA

I am so very sorry - my first three miscarriages were also back to back in a 7 month period of time. I know how devastating and frustrating it can be. Wishing you better things to come.

Shinejil said...

I am so sorry you're dealing with this, and I hope you get some answers and heal as quickly as possible.

Andie said...

I'm so sorry for your loss. I hope you get some answers from the testing. I have been there and it is awful. Sending you peace and hugs and healing.

Here from LFCA.

sassy said...

Oh I'm so so sorry. (insert profanity here)

expectingamiracle said...

I am so sorry. :(

Anonymous said...

Have you tried Traditional Chinese Medicine? It has another way of looking at and treating infertility.

Jessica